Mathoms, etc.

I had the weirdest dream yesterday so I thought I would document it because it was strange and fun. I was trying to decide if I should wed Jason Segel but Kris Jenner was mad at me because I wouldn't marry her son. I don't even know who it was, or how many sons she has. I just remember thinking I would never become a Kardashian. Anyway, all of a sudden, I was in my lovely wedding gown at the venue. I see Jason and I told him it's bad luck to see each other before the wedding. He told me it was OK because I wasn't completely ready yet. (I still had to do my hair and make-up. Why I would wear the gown around without getting that done first is beyond me.) So my high school classmate Dr. Iris does my make-up, and tells me she doesn't have a veil or tiara or whatever headpiece I should have on my hair. I try to reach one of the Jersey Shore girls (again, I don't know who it was) so they could get me one. I remember wanting a tiara at least, something Arwen, Elrond, or Galadriel would wear. I notice that I'm wearing flat brown shoes and mismatched socks. Actually, the left one was a sock, and the right one was a stocking but it had a run in it. I wasn't concerned about getting hosiery that matched. So now I'm looking for one without a hole in it. I didn't even want different shoes. I decide to wear another dress instead, like the one Carolyn Bessette-Kennedy wore, but in blue. As I'm in the room getting ready, Jason's co-star on "How I Met your Mother"Josh Radnor professes his love for me. I figured it was time to wake up at this point. I woke up with the sense that Jason was the right husband for me. Probably because he loves Kermit the Frog and the Muppets.

Before anyone thinks I'm a lunatic or reality show junkie, I THINK I can totally explain everything. I had watched The Muppets movie this past weekend, and saw Jason Segel's interview on Conan. We were also watching The View at work when Barbara Walters revealed that the Kardashians were on her list of Most Fascinating People of 2011. Along with her co-hosts, I reacted violently to this. (I'm hoping for a time when they will not be on the news ever again.) Then later that day, one of our patients was talking about the dastardly Kardashians again, then went on to her other favorite reality show, Jersey Shore. I found out that Snooki's friend Caitlin Ryder works where I work ( I see her all the time but didn't know she was Snooki's gal pal.) As far as the wedding, I had been looking at Facebook wedding pictures of my brother-in-law's niece. Or maybe because I saw a picture of Bella with Edward at the altar, showing the details on the back of her wedding dress. Socks? I have a teenage patient who always wears mismatched crazy socks, and thinking how fun that is and wondering why I never did that. "How I Met your Mother"? I never watch it unless it comes on after our FX movie at work, and even then, I'm not really watching.

I still have no idea why Iris was doing my make-up. Does anyone think I need psychotherapy?