Mathoms, etc.

I've compiled this list of Facebook fan pages that I found funny or interesting, or simply truthful. In no particular order---

1. Everything is 4x Funnier when you're supposed to be quiet
2. When babies wrap their tiny hand around your one finger and squeeze
3. Girls having more guy friends because they cause less drama
4. Waking up to find it's snowing
   
5. I say never mind because I'm too lazy to repeat myself
6. I love waking up in the night and realizing I still have hours to sleep
7. If the Bell doesn't dismiss me, then the Bell doesn't decide when I arrive
8. "Is the door locked?""Yes."(I'm going to check anyway.) "Yep, locked."
   
9. I hate when boys are on their periods
10. "tara na" "tara" pero wala pa ring tumatayo
11. I heart my mom for everything she has done
12. One day someone is going to punch you in the face... and I will laugh
13. Wag mo kong kausapin kung ganito ka mag-type: EoW PoW UzTah Na pOw kAy0?jEje
14. Hindi naman ako magsisinungaling kung papayagan ako eh!
    
15. I'm not cranky you're annoying
16. As a kid I used to jump from couch to couch to avoid the lava and quicksand
17. If you touch me one more time I will slap you
18. I wasn't being mean I was being honest
19. Eating cereal even though it isn't breakfast time
20. Saying "ouch", just in case something hurts
    
21. Don't you hate it when your spoon bends while you're trying to get ice cream
22. If a turtle loses his shell, is he naked? or homeless?
23. I put things down and forget where they are 2 minutes later
24. I hate when you write someone a whole paragraph and they reply "OK"
25. Don't text me while I'm texting you. Now I have to change my text
26. That moment of joy when you see your food coming in a restaurant
27. I hate when one string of my hoodie becomes longer than the other
    
28. I didn't type that message to exercise my fingers...I want a reply
29. I love your accent, it's awesome! Say more words!
30. "That's what she said"...well whoever SHE IS, she sounds like a whore...
31. Why can I do it perfectly? Until I go to show someone?
32. Saying "oh" like you get it, but you still have no idea
33. The cereal on the Cinnamon Toast Crunch commercials are cannibals
34. If Duct tape, Tylenol or Band Aids can't fix it, you've got a problem
35. I redo high fives if they weren't good enough the first time
36. That awkward distance when you don't know if you should hold the door or not
37. My mind was blown when I realized the word "bed" actually looks like a bed
38. I heart it when someone's laugh is funnier than the joke
39. "Who are you on the phone with?" "My drug dealer, Mom"
40. I feel like I can run 10x faster in hotel hallways
41. Thank you hand sanitizer, for telling me I have a cut on my hand
42. Why is Monday so far from Friday, but Friday so close to Monday?
43. "I'm bored." "Go clean your room." "No thanks. I have better things to do."
44. If you kick my chair one more time, I will turn around and hit you
45. Just hearing your annoying voice makes me want to stab you
46. When I turn off the lights downstairs, I run for my life
47. Wow you're weird...I can tell we're going to be great friends
48. Dear bed, I'm sorry I left you this morning. Take me back?
49. I randomly burst into song because of what you just said
50. Sorry McDonald's...but I really don't think Olympic athletes eat your food
51. I blame Disney for my high expectations of men
52. Whenever I can't find something it just magically appears when my mom looks
53. LOL has gone from "laughing out loud" to "I have nothing to say"
54. I don't look out windows at night because I'm afraid of seeing a face
55. "Is there gonna be food?""Yeah" "OK,then I'm coming."
56. I check in showers for murderers but I don't know what I'd do if I found one
57. I didn't trip, I was testing gravity. It still works.
58. When I was your age, I was your age
59. "Hi can I help you?" "No I just walked into the store!"
60. My name is______and I have a "Becoming a fan" problem
61. There is always a reason behind every "just wondering"
62. "I can't do this!" "Let me do it."*jar opens* "I loosened it for you."
63. "You don't wanna know." "Actually I do, that's kinda why I asked."
    
64. I ran out of things to do on Facebook...yet I'm still on it
65. Must... stop...becoming a fan...OMG that's so true *become a fan*
66. Pandas are the least racist animal, they're black, white and ASIAN!
67. So if you can't tell me, why mention it?
68. "Don't see me, don't see me, don't see me"..."Hey!"..."f*ck"
69. Why do we have to be quiet during a fire drill? Can the fire hear us?
70. Wanna NOT stop in the middle of the hallway, thanks
71. It was here a minute ago...you took it didn't you! Oh there it is
72. No Mom, you're mad because you're wrong, not because I'm talking back
73. Why can't chickens fly? I mean they have wings!Fly bitch fly!
74. I love driving under a bridge in the rain so it's quiet for 2 seconds
    
75. Good songs always come on when you're near your destination