I am so done with you. You are the most stubborn, selfish, unreasonable person I have ever known. You lack all human compassion, have no consideration for others, always thinking only of yourself. Last year's and more recent events have made me wonder why you are in my life. What could I have done in a past life that you're here to torture us? I should be grateful because I would not be here without you. And yet I find no higher purpose or meaning to the havoc you wreak upon our lives.
My brother-in-law's father passed away recently. I consider his life well-lived because instead of a large mansion or an expensive car, he left behind a grieving family. Instead of monetary inheritances, he left happy memories to bring them comfort. Now there's an accomplished man.
I remember working with a man at a nursing home. He was always so pleasant with us therapists. And yet, he had no visitors. We found out eventually that all his children have deserted him. Because he had been a horrible father to them. I fully understand his children's motivations. I pray this is not your fate.
When we pray for patience, for example, it makes sense that we don't automatically become patient. We are presented with opportunities to exhibit or develop patience. But you are really pushing your luck. You're a sad man unwilling to open his eyes and mind to someone else's opinions and knowledge. You're beyond changing your ways. "Psychology becomes your biology." You can't tolerate an open heart procedure, because you won't open your heart to love and all things good. One of your sisters even said your heart will explode if they attempt it. It's been opened once before, and you remained closed off. Your arteries have hardened, blood vessels are blocked, because you are a hard man.
You have learned nothing. I pray this is not my fate.
About me
Lani: bellyacher, curmudgeon, malcontent.
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